I really thought we were still happy with each other. I never imagined that the last time we’ve met would be the last time I’ll ever hug and kiss him.
At that moment, when he walked me to the station on the way to work, I brushed away the sad feeling lingering in my chest. My heart felt there was already something wrong with the way he moved around me.
But even then, I chose to ignore the signs. I ignored the jealous feeling when they posted a screenshot of their Cabal characters as their primary photos at Friendster a few months back. I did not think too much of the numerous times he was not able to answer my calls, even in the middle of the day. I overlooked the fact that he virtually stopped texting me as often as he used to.
I still convinced myself that everything is fine.
If he only knew how I cried every night for him, because I felt that he paid little attention to me these past few months.
I still really love him. Call me stupid, but I still care for him, regardless of what he has done to me. As much as I wanted to blame him for what has happened, I can’t. I just can’t. I care too much.
I kept telling everyone not to be angry at him, because he loved me for the past 3 years. I kept telling them it was probably my fault, that I failed to be the perfect girl for him, and that he found someone who would better understand him.
I don’t want him to be the villain in this story. Until the end, I’m still trying to protect him.
Since there’s no more you and me
It’s time I let you go
So I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is I’ll be fine without you
Yes I will.
-Leona Lewis, Better in Time
